R u happysharma?

We all love recognition, we all also love to be recognized, don’t we?
I do, very much! I aint ashamed of admitting at all, it gives a huge ego boost to me to know that people recognize me.

Yesterday was one such ego boosting day for me.On the way to CP .....Just as I was about to enter into a showroom, I felt a gentle tap on my shoulders, I turned around ... middle aged guy standing next to me. He smiled and asked me, ‘excuse me'," are you happysharma?”I was zapped completely, I stared at him, wide eyed, for a few seconds, before nodding my head, “yes I am…” then his smile broke into a wide grin, and he extended, almost thrust his hand towards me, “ I am lonelyangel” . And I shot back with “I don’t belive this” and this is how I met an old blogger. For the very first time, someone recognized me as ‘happysharma’, I cant tell you how happy I was, happy is too mild a word to describe the state of my mind and my heart !

All those dozens of blogs finally paid off, that’s how I felt, And now we both feel that we were destined to meet somehow! Our contacts revived he gave me lots of suggestions for which I am thankful!!

That was such a happy moment !!

Happy !!

The fault is mine

I was looking to some poems and suddendly I came accross this one .....

I just want to say sorry to all


Your friendship is a gift
Oh so precious and so rare
Sometimes I take it for granted
Sometimes I do despair

Some days I say ,you are my friend
Some days I treat you bad
I say things I don’t mean
But I never meant to make you mad

Everyday is a struggle for me
My mind is an angry storm
Suffering from illness
That makes me feel forlorn

They say I will get better
All I need is time
Meanwhile I am losing friends
Which is not a very good sign

I live in fear of a particular treatment
The chance of being placed in a hospital
Surrounded by doctors and ones like me
I fear it may be possible

Oh I wish I could get better
And stop the voices in my head
That make me angry and fearful
Causing me to say things I should have never said


Your love for me was wonderful
So precious and so rare
You loved me no matter what
And made me feel good everywhere


It tore you up and hurt you beyond repair
I ceased all contact with you because I got so mad
Now I regret writing it and cry all day
It was not worth it making you so sad.

Nothing good comes out of conflict
Nothing positive is near
I pray that you can someday forgive me
And speak those words that I want to hear

My fault is being sick
My mistakes are everywhere
Please let me not lose the gift
That is so precious and so rare.

Happy !

"Change your thoughts you can change the world "

I met Rama after a gap of 4 years in June 2008 ,She presented me a coffee mug with a quote printed "Change your thoughts you can change the world ".That time I did not understand the zest of the quote but yesterday while I was having coffee in the same mug I read the quote and realised what I have done !!!Thanks Sweety

It's been 4 months now I was countiounsly saying I m out of my mind ,M I ?Manytimes I have heared ppl saying I am selfish,Careless,egostic ...blah blah !
I was afraid M I really the same ?I asked my parents they said you are bit irritating thats it ,parents are the loving pillars ,they will never say I am stupid ,I mean how can they ..then I asked many friends number of times ,but everytime I've got stupid answers,without anything solid .But the last words were always "No,You are not".But suddendly I start reliasing that I am full of negative thoughts with a poisonous attitude.Every time I say something, it’s always negative and I feel like I'm just sucking the life like a vampire.I mean it’s okay to express how you feel but I've started looking at the world in a totally different light. I’ve learned now when you speak, you speak things into existences. When you say “I’m good for nothing”, you view yourself that way and you don’t take care of yourself the way you should. But when you say “I Am Perfect, Confidence, Intelligent, I AM ME”…then you feel better about yourself and you encourage others around you to be great.This is what exactly I feel .I have stop sucking others life .I am no more a vampire .
Honestly, the people we meet daily reflect who you are as a person n when they hang out with negative people like me they are not as happy as they should be BUT when really they hang out with someone who is positive they tend to smile more and feel more alive.So I've decided to live them their lives to the happiest.there is no place for a vampire in anyones life .I wish I could change it .uhmm..yeah I know its my attitude ..but I really don't know why I am on the above thinking path .It just came to my mind.

Happy !

One more year ....

One more day one more year ...
I didn't expect anyone of my friends to remember my birthday because I myself usually don't remember others:P But I was surprised when few of friends did remember mine .lolz ! but still sumof them missed it :( was expecting them to wish ...

Thanks all for making my day special :))

I'll upload the pics on FB soon

H@ppy

Happy as always

One more day .....one more chat..hehehehe!!

Life is good as always .....

**I***:Hi ,kaise hai mote ?


H@ppy:Hey ! I am good as always ..tu suna ?

**I***:oh! really ..Good as always ..ahem ahem .............tu rehen de ..aur bta koi nayi taazi ?

H@ppy:nae ya ! ntng new ..same office offcie ..n its a sunday ..just chilling .. :P

**I***:Birthday plans ?

H@ppy:whats dat ? whoose b'day plans ?

**I***:oye hoye ! bhav shav ..kissi ka birthday aa rha hai ...

H@ppy:heheh!! Ur talking about mine ....lolz !I thought sumthing else ! Sorry ya! No plans frm myend ..

**I***:oh really ...thats gud.how abt billi ? giving a chance this year ?

H@ppy:probably yes :)

**I***:Go for it sweety ..I know you can do it :)))))

H@ppy:Pump dene ke liye thanks !

**I***:May I ask you 1thing ?

H@ppy:nah !

**I***:okies

H@ppy:oye :0..asko beta

**I***:Are you allright ?

H@ppy:thats wht U wana ask ?gosh !

**I***:Answer my qus 100%

H@ppy:uhmmm ..50-50 chalega ;)

**I***:tu kabhi serious hogi ?thik se bta

H@ppy:Yeah ! I am allright..ek dum rapchik mast ,,fatak !

**I***:I got my answer :)))))

H@ppy:wht?

**I***:there is somthing cooking in your mind ,it's okay if you don't want to share

H@ppy:there you go :) time aane de btati hu detail me ..BTW Me on FB ..

**I***:what FB?

H@ppy:Facebook

**I***:I don't have a facebook account

H@ppy:bna le fir ..its free of cost ..hehe!!

**I***:stop laughing ..dekhte hai

**I***:oye sun

H@ppy:oye suna

**I***:hows teri blogging ?

H@ppy:dn't chnage d topic ..Puch kya puchna hai

**I***:mmmm ..bta ab

H@ppy:thik hai ..bas ek bechara blog bcha hai ..I hardly blog ..kuch topics hi nae hai likhne ke liye ..awe hi sumtime time ker leti hu om happysharma .

**I***:hawwww!

H@ppy:take a chill pill ;)tu to aise bol rhe hai jaise mere blog follow kerti thi ..hehehe!!only Gommi d read my blogs :( tum to bade log time hi nae hota ..:X

**I***:mote aisa nahi hai.. accha post this chat on your blog

H@ppy:r u nuts ?

**I***:"I can do anything " now post this chat .

H@ppy:hahaha!oh aisa ..chalo 'l Do that on monday ..Mail me this chat on my KCC id ..I m using cell phone .

**I***:sure

H@ppy:chal I shuld sleep nw .byee

**I***:haan so ja ..office office khelna kal se .hehehe

H@ppy:beep beep :X

**I***:hehehe .gudnyt

H@ppy:gud 9t .futto ab

Twist

I am happy to write once again ...Now its about all the messengers I've installed.What to say now ? I've a account on allmost every comman website ..you name them and I have a account if I don't I'll create it latter :P**

I'd stopped using Yahoo ,Rediff and MSN long long back but still their icons are on my desktop ..I promised to myself along with all the stupid estuff I am gona delete all those messangers from my desktop whenever I'll getback home.

I was planning to delete my one and only Gmail account which I use the most .

Then I realised there is no point deleting the email account lets disable the chat option ...uhmm I gave a thought again and finally decided I'll block some people rather to disable the chat .I am away from home not using my PC ..Its my Cell phone device which connects me to Internet ..A wise friend suggested to change the phone (People jealous of my multimedia phone ..hahah!! but its really hard to digest ..I can't change the phone ..grrr!)

Then he suggested me to deactivate GPRS from my cell phone .That was really a wonderful idea .I'll be having a email account but I'll move away from chat !!!Bingo !that's exactly what I was looking for ....So finally stopped chatting ..rather I would say I have not stopped totally ;), but my situation is under-controlled now.I no longer stay up late just for chatting..I have been chatting onl9 for years. It has not done any good to me***, I knew alot of idiots online***, but I have also got to know a few nice people, and I appreciate the friendship I found here. However, I have found myself too relying on virtual world to express myself. I guess now it is time to let go of this and return to real life to really find someone I can trust.A true friend !!!!duh! heavy words !

I have implemented strict rules about chatting. its not the only way to communicate Another way of communication is e-mail, so I'm just using it!

HAppy!!

** IF its not paid

*** not true for all

OMG! Is it really happening with me :P

lines from some SMS I have had in last 24 hours ! (Soacha nae tha ki itna bda kuch ker dia meine ...)
whats wrong with you ?
are you olrite ?
Everything olrite ?Y u deleted your Orkut ?
nice way to show ur attitude ;)
are you mad ?
bas ye bta hua kya hai ?(they think I'm gone mad )abhe ab koi Orkut se account delete kerdega toh woh pagal ho gya kya !! :0
I had more than 100 friends, 20+ fans, 25+testimonials & scraps (I use to delete almst evertime I login ), at "the" orkut. These numbers are quite ok 'coz I've got frnds who hve something like 400-500 friends, 100+ fans, 50+ testimonials & 10000+ scraps.
Gosh!....What a popularity..!!(N My frnds use to say happy u r Populr..M I ? ahem ahem!!

Don't know whenever we meet neone ,newhere be it a bus ....d first thing we ask after a short talk ..
Guess ? ?
letme tell you ....

whats your ID I'll add you on Orkut! yeah ! ....WTH!I did it sevral times
now as I had 100+ friends ,I have myphone book memory flooding with phone numbers But I receive calls from selected numbers then why the hell the numbers were in my Memory card ..pta nae !!
Muje bhi nae pta !!So finally I've deleted all the numbers and moved a new song to the memory ;) !!(Best utilisation of memory space )

uhmmmmm ..lets think mature now ..lots of fans ,friends does that really mean that I had so many "friends", so many "fans" & so much popularity..??
Do I really deserve all those sweet & superior words that were all written in my "testimonials"..!! If I want to think non-pessimistic , I'd say, arey yaar! Of course ,I do ..they are all my friends some were fans too ;)lolz!& I deserve those testimonials.heheeh!! But on the other hand, if I introspect, retrospect & try to see that reality, I come to know that I was seriously under heavy misconceptions.
every Second Testi had a line "she is confident,Always smiling ,happy as her name blah blah !! M I really the same ?I had a hard time thinking on these things and finally come to the point that - nae ya ! mein aise nae hu...bahut ho gya ! ab nae !
I was reading a book ..better to say I was asked to read a book (Papa ne Dhamki hi di thi seedhe seedhe padlena na bus me timebhi accha pass ho gayega ..Don't listen to that songs jo pachas baar sun chuke ho n u want to complete century ...beta U'll have to read that book will ask what was there in the book next weekeend )
and you know what ?
I felt so bore to read the book for 1 hour ..then I felt yaar! ab padna toh hai he maje le ker padte hai n then I was happy to note that today only I was able to understand the social philosphy ..apne words me bole toh orkut's philosophy...yaar ghuma fira ker sab baatein yahi atak jaati hai Gmail /yahoo the online stuff!! (and hence the psychology of so many of my 'so called' "friends", vis-a-vis my own psychology) & hence I'd say I rightly deleted my account.
All my friends likes to share their achievements, their prosperity & good times to all of his/her friends through the Orkut's albums. There are people who share their such snaps, but I felt jealous of them (something which is impossible between friends). Similiarly there are people who felt jealous seeing my snaps. But still we enjoy a place in each other's "friend list" or may be even in "fan's list"..!!:)After realizing all the above, I know very well that if I'll need a help of any of my (orkut or socalled old friends ) friends & if I ask them, these are the only persons who will not help me & make the fun of my necessity. I have faced these situations 2-3 times in last days (that I needed a friend's help & the refused indirectly) & hence am so confident that one must must must not expect any help from friends.
Actually I dont expect anything from anyone friend or whomsoever, and that is the best way to maintain any friendship.That is my philosophy..!! :)

Also, it is well said: "One is your friend till you don't expect anything from him/her; and you are his/her friend till you fullfill all of his expectations..!!" Gone are the days of "A friend in need is the friend indeed". :D
And above all, orkut was sucking all of my free time. Orkut kills time. The presence of orkut in my life, kept me away from blogging, newspapers ,books and & so many things.and hence now I hope probably I'd spend some more time here with some of my passions(Its been couple of years I m doing thing coz I've to do them ..now will do things as I want to do them ) and of course with some good books and some real friends .At the outset, I am very happy to delete my orkut account. :))))))
*******And this post doesn't say that I wasn't happy with my frnd circle ,I was not happy nehow ...areey naam hi happy hai ..have to maintain the degnity ;)lolz!(Kaafi maje kiye hai) .Have got sum gems as frnds its just we don't have time for Orkut n stuff!

I am so very happy :)
Cheers !!
Happy :)

I'm still live on gamil @ Sharmahappyalways@gmail.com